The Life of Barry Frost
by OTH-FOQ
Summary: A tribute to Lee Thompson Song lyrics : The Fray - Be Still


**It's been a week and it still feels surreal. There are many things I don't understand, and this is one of them.**

**I hope Lee's family and friends, and the whole cast and crew of _Rizzoli and Isles_ will recover from this tragic loss and be strong enough to keep going without him.**

**This is my tribute to his character Barold Frost on _Rizzoli and Isles_. I am not a native speaker so you will probably find a few mistakes. Sorry for that. I tried to make it as perfect as possible.**

**Goodbye, Lee Thompson Young, and thank you for your work on the show.**

* * *

_Be still and know that I'm with you  
Be still and know that I am here  
Be still and know that I'm with you  
Be still, be still, and know_

Barry Frost was many things. A son, a friend, a partner, a lover, a fighter.

At age six, he had decided that he wanted to be a policeman. The idea had never really left him. Little did he know at that time that it was indeed what he would become, and more.

A few years later, his parents had gotten a divorce and Barry had instinctively known that he would never have a close relationship with his father. So he did everything in his power to make his mother proud of him. He had sworn to himself that, no matter what, he would never neglect the people that he loved and who loved him back. That he would never become his father.

At age twelve, Barry had fallen in love for the very first time. Her name was Rachel, and she was as beautiful as the sun, or so he thought. That was when he realized that he would do anything for the people that he held dear.

Those who knew him were unanimous: Barry was gold. He was a young, sweet, clever boy who would go far in life. They could tell, even before he turned fifteen, that Barry would dedicate his life to helping people. It was in his nature. He was kind-hearted.

At eighteen, Barry graduated high-school and left town to join an elite prep school. It had been hard for him to leave friends and family behind. But Barry had one goal in life and he would do anything to achieve it. Nothing could stand in his way.

At twenty-three, Barry Frost joined the police forces. He was assigned to the department of Robbery. That was fine by him, although since he had entered the elite school, he had been dreaming of joining the Homicide squad. He had heard of a young woman—six years older than him—that had made it there despite her age and gender. Barry had wanted to meet her ever since.

A year later, while working on a bank robbery, Barry Frost met Anna Farrell. The young woman wanted to become an FBI agent, and Barry offered her his unconditional support and love. He was happy. And when he proposed, seven months after their first date, Anna said yes.

Shortly after, however, Anna was offered a position within the FBI. Barry encouraged her to accept, and so she did. But with the job came obligations. Anna started to work long hours, leaving early in the morning only to come home late at night. It took a toll on their relationship. Their life together changed, and suddenly there were shouts and tears, anger and disappointment. One day, Barry woke up to find Anna's engagement ring on the pillow next to him.

_When darkness comes upon you  
And covers you with fear and shame  
Be still and know that I'm with you  
And I will say your name_

Letting someone in became difficult for Barry after the fiasco with Anna. He completely submerged himself in work to forget his heartache. Regularly, he'd pick up the phone and call his mother to let her know how he was doing. A part of him was hoping that Anna would call him and ask for his forgiveness. She never did. And after months of waiting, hoping for nothing, Barry gave up and started to move on.

One day, as he was walking into the precinct of the BPD, Lieutenant Cavanaugh caught him and asked him to come to his office some time during the day. Barry said he would. When he walked out of the precinct at eight o'clock that evening, Frost had the broadest smile on his face. He had succeeded. He had made it to Homicide. And he was going to be Jane Rizzoli's new partner.

They were formally introduced to each other the next day and hit it off instantly. Jane was tough and strong, but also very kind and welcoming. She told him a bit about her life and her professional path. She never mentioned her love life and he never asked.

Her former partner, Vincent Korsak, gave Frost the cold shoulder during his first months in Homicide. Korsak had been partnered with Jane two years after she had started in the Drug Control Unit, before making it together to Homicide. Frost had heard about the "case that had gone wrong". Charles Hoyt had managed to break Jane and Vincent's partnership. Frost often wondered why, and one day he had finally asked Korsak about it. Months later, when Jane had finally opened up about it, Frost had realized that Korsak was wrong. He didn't know that the reason why Jane had requested a new partner was not because she didn't trust him but because she didn't trust herself. And Frost, being the good man that he was, had told Jane to make it right with her former partner.

_If terror falls upon your bed  
And sleep no longer comes  
Remember all the words I said  
Be still, be still, and know_

Things were better after that. Korsak warmed up to him and the three of them made one hell of a team. Frost also really liked the Chief Medical Examiner, Maura Isles. She was Jane's closest friend and a person easy to talk to. Embarrassed because of his inability to keep his lunch down when he saw a dead body or too much blood, Frost had been mocked by some guys from other units. Jane had told them to get lost, and Maura had explained to him that things would get better with experience. She had found the words to reassure him, and he was grateful for that.

A year passed, and a case involving the Marine saw Frost running into his father. After years of silence, the Admiral could not even have the decency to tell his son that he was proud of him. Korsak did, though. He told Frost that he was a great detective.

The evenings were often spent at the Dirty Robber. Frost liked it, there. It was always fun to hang out with his colleagues after work. It allowed them to relax, especially after hard cases. Sometimes, Frost caught himself wishing that he had never wanted to become a cop. The atrocities he heard about, or saw, made him lose each time a little more faith in humanity. The sweet, young boy that he had once been had long lost his innocence. Frost missed him.

Anna came back into his life during a case involving the FBI. Things were tense at first, but by the end of the day, when they had caught the thieves, Jane had advised him to go talk to her. She had apologized and he had forgiven her for breaking his heart years ago. But they were over, and they both knew it.

_And when you go through the valley  
And the shadow comes down from the hill  
If morning never comes to be  
Be still, be still, be still_

The months passed quickly. When Frost took the time to really think about it, it amazed him to see how quickly things could change. For the best, or the worst. Maura had found her birth mother and half-sister. Jane's boyfriend, Casey, had survived a tricky surgery to regain the use of his legs after a bombing in Afghanistan. And even Korsak had reconnected with his stepson. Frost's mother had come to visit him with her roommate and her son. At least that's how she had introduced them to everybody. But Frost knew better, and he had said so. If his mother was happy, then so was he.

Jane, Korsak and Frost spent their days solving murder cases and putting away killers. It was a comfortable routine despite the terrible nature of their job. Frost felt like he belonged there, in the Homicide Unit of the BPD. Every morning he woke up with renewed energy, ready to fight for justice, to help people, to stop bad guys.

Today was no different.

_If you forget the way to go  
And lose where you came from  
If no one is standing beside you  
Be still and know I am_

Except that it was.

Frost was alone when he heard the gunshot. He immediately called for backup. Jane and Korsak would be here soon. He had just been closer to the location of their number one suspect than them, and so he had gone by himself.

What a mistake, he realized. The man was armed. Frost should have known better. He ran after the killer, hoping that his partners would show up now.

"Boston police! Drop the gun!" He shouted.

His order was ignored as the man turned round and fired twice. Frost felt the bullets brush past him. He retaliated but missed. The killer ran away and Frost had no other choice but to run after him. He heard a noise coming from behind him, and that was his second mistake.

For a split moment, Frost turned his head to look back. Then he heard another gunshot, and before he could even process what was happening, his legs gave out and he fell to the floor, on his knees. Immediately, almost automatically, his right hand raised and he fired again. The sound that came from the man told Frost that he had at least wounded him.

Frost didn't know how many seconds passed by as he lied on the floor, in silence. The absence of noise made him believe that the last bullet he had fired had indeed killed the man. Then suddenly, one of the doors of the warehouse swung open and the metallic bang echoed in his ears.

"Frost?"

It was Jane. Frost wanted to shout to give his position but he found out that he couldn't. Instead, he choked on some blood. With horror, he realized that it was his own blood.

"Frost!"

Jane had found him. Behind her, Frost could hear the heavy footsteps of Korsak.

"Frost! Korsak, call 911!"

Jane fell to her knees and her eyes took in his injuries. Her hands went to his abdomen and Frost guessed that she was applying some pressure where the bullet had hit him. He couldn't feel it.

"Jane…"

"Shh, don't talk, keep your strength. Korsak!"

Korsak was on the phone, giving their location to the paramedics.

"Check the suspect, see if he's still alive," Jane ordered.

Then she refocused on Frost.

"Listen to me, you are going to get through this. It's barely a scratch, you're stronger than that."

"Liar," Frost managed to speak.

He smiled at her. There were tears in her eyes. Frost was vaguely aware that Korsak was now kneeling on the other side of him. His hands had joined Jane's and together they were doing their best to keep his blood from spilling all over the ground. But Frost knew that it was too late, and he knew that they knew it too. His eyelids were heavy. His strength was leaving him. He could literally feel the life drained from his body.

"Come on Frost, stay with us!"

"Frost, buddy, just breathe," Korsak added.

His eyes found those of the older man and Frost saw the understanding there. He saw the resignation in them, the guilt and the sadness.

"Korsak."

"What is it, boy?"

"T—take care. Of yourself. Of Jane."

"You are not dying!" Jane yelled forcefully.

But Frost kept his eyes on Korsak until the Sergeant nodded. Then he turned his head back toward Jane.

"Jane. Please."

"Where the hell are the paramedics?!"

"Partner," Frost said softly.

The young woman finally looked him in the eyes. Tears were now falling freely on her cheeks. Frost grabbed one of her hands and held it to his heart.

"It's okay," he whispered.

"Frost please, don't do that!"

"You have to—"

He coughed some blood and Jane winced.

"You have to let me go now."

"No! No…"

Frost had never heard Jane so distraught. He felt sorry to cause her so much pain. With as much strength as he could muster, he squeezed her hand.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't, don't be sorry Frost. You were just doing your job. I failed you, _I'm_ sorry."

"You did not."

They remained silent for a few seconds. Korsak was fighting hard to keep his own tears from falling down. Frost took a sharp intake of breath and Jane gripped his hand even tighter.

"I'm sorry," he croaked. "Be strong."

Frost's brown eyes were burning with an intensity that Jane had never seen before.

"Promise me—that you'll keep—going. Never give up."

"I promise."

"Good."

Somewhere in the distance, the sirens of ambulances could be heard.

"Go now, my friend," Korsak said gently.

Jane cried harder. There was just too much blood and nothing she could do.

"Jane."

"Yes, Barry?"

"Thank you."

She smiled weakly at him.

As he felt the remaining of his strength leave his body, Frost looked one last time at Jane, and then closed his eyes. He felt no pain, his whole body was numb.

"Thank you both," he whispered. "Be strong."

And with one last smile, Frost welcomed death.

Barry Frost was many things. A son, a friend, a partner, a lover, a fighter.

But today, Barry Frost was no longer.

_Be still and know that I'm with you  
Be still and know I am_

* * *

_**In memory of Lee Thompson Young (1984 – 2013)**_

_**You were gone way too soon. May you rest in peace.**_

* * *

**OTH-FOQ**


End file.
